What to pack:
Depending on the festival type, you’ll either be camping or heading home to a bed/couch each evening. In either case, you’ll want to pack light, yet comfortable. Most festivals being in the summer allow for t-shirts and shorts to dominate your festival wardrobe. I personally recommend some serious headgear. Hippies, cowboys and Jews all agree, covering your dome is crucial in that scorching heat.

Snacks. You’ll be traversing up and down amphitheater stairs till you’re content with watching Girl Talk on your back under a tree. The body needs fuel and those $8 gyros aren’t going to cut it. I’m a huge fan of the Nature Valley line of health bars. They’re everything you need and nothing you don’t. A couple fistful of these bad boys and you’ll be out-dancing even the most colorful hipsters at Thunderheist.

Shades. No point in being at the festival if you can’t see wtf is going on. Blu-Blockers, they’re hip.

Shoes. Skip the sandals people. A) Festival feet are gross. B) You’ll be walking at least a couple miles in the heat from 2-12 at night, not including the multiple dance parties you’ll be partaking in. C) Festival feet are really, really gross. If the hippie in you is dying to air out, just take those kicks off and waft around a bit. Ever try to walk 10 ft. with a busted flip-flop. Epic fail.

Homework. Festivals are the Barcardi 151′s of the music scene, best bang for your buck and you’ll have no recollection of what the hell happened come Monday morning. Hundreds of artists all packed in a couple of days for you weekend warriors looking to get loose. Do your homework. Load up your ipods, zunes, izunes, and zunepods with upcoming shows and give those artists at the bottom of the line-up page a listen. Their grueling 1pm afternoon set might be the show of the weekend.

Memory machines. Show off to all your friends Monday morning by updating your wickedly cool profile pictures. Whether you’re a pro photographer or just a top-seeded amateur, chances are if you had a good time, you won’t remember much. Forget the fancy gizmo-porn. Just take copious amounts of photos. Flickr doesn’t care if you use your iphone or a disposable camera (yes, they still make these), great shots are made from great opportunities. Think Monotonix.

Punctuality is key. Get a schedule. Print it out. Download it to your phone. Memorize it. Pneumonic device it. Whatever. No excuses. I’d hate for you to miss Deer Tick because you were too busy hover-squatting in the portapotty on the other side of the festival.

Now the trick it to stay focused the rest of the week at work. Fake excel window anyone?

Five!

Five dollar!

Five dollar footlong! pitchers of beer, bitches.

If you’re looking for an affordable bar night, check out the “Ice House” on Yale Boulevard, close to the intersection with Greenville Avenue. It’s owned by the same people who own the “Across the Street Bar” immediately next door, but you wouldn’t guess that from looking at them side-by-side.

“Across the Street Bar” is usually jam-packed on Fridays and weekends, while the “Ice House” seems like a relative ghost town all the time. Apart from the lone bartender who works there, I have yet to see anyone inside. In addition, “Ice House” is a cash-only, beer-only establishment with a mere 4 or 5 beers on tap to choose from, which contrasts with the fully stocked bar over at “Across”. Plus, “Ice House” looks like the kind of place you might go to quietly rape someone or do meth. Pretty it ain’t.

But underneath these cosmetic setbacks lies the golden nugget. $5 pitchers of beer, everynight, from 8 till close. Five bucks, including a Shiner pitcher. I don’t care what part of Dallas you’re from – that’s a steal.

The place does have its own unique charm too. In addition to a spacious patio with tables (summer’s on the way people), you get a bartender named Delmo who knows magic. Not tricks, but real deal magic (as he put it, “tricks are for whores”).

So if you want a quiet vibe with cheap, refreshing beer for a weeknight, I suggest skipping the noise and expense of your typical joint and visit the “Ice House” instead.

Draft magazine

Not your average yuppie-filled pub, the Amsterdam is a low-key, TV-free zone where you can concentrate on the drinking menu full of beers (try the Live Oak Hefe Weizen brewed in Austin). Kick it inside the airy, high ceilinged bar, or out on the patio during that nice Texas weather–just watch out for beer-juggling bartenders.

Amsterdam Bar, located at 831 Exposition Avenue, is your neighborhood Cheers, where even Sheldon, one of the best bartenders in town knows your name. The atmosphere is always friendly and the girls are hipster-ishly cute. With very little pretentiousness if any at all, this place has been my Austin away from Austin for a couple months now. It lies in the struggling but regrowing area of Fair Park next to Victory Sport Taekwondo, and Rob’s Chop Shop and offers an array of draft choices served with a hat-trick and  smile. Prices are very competitive, which makes it very difficult to try any of the other nearby establishments.

Bonus: Monday nights include free jazz from a handful of musicians. According to the Amsterdam blog, the lineup is based on the members of The Shelley Carrol quartet, but the lineup changes weekly as individuals take a night off and friends and guests sit in for a set or even for the entire evening.

Got the case of the Mondays? Come out and chill with the cool cats at Amsterdam. And if you’re feeling a little hesitant about the heavy drinking, try the ACE Pear Cider, described by one patron as “liquid candy”.

It goes without saying that I’ve been really anticipating the final chapter in this delicious saga, the aptly named Shiner Commemorator (or Shiner 100), which was released in Dallas a few weeks after the New Year. After years of build up, I had (perhaps unreal) expectations of this beer being the absolute pinnacle of Texas beer-dom.

It is with profound sadness that I so write this judgement: Commemorator is a big let-down. I’m not going into the milieu used to “professionally” break down beer, but will describe some of my impressions. I found the first malty sip enjoyable, but with each successive drink there was a growing metallic, boozy after-taste that left me cringing. In a weird way, it reminded me of that lingering taste you get when drinking a Miller High Life, except it’s a darker. This is not a good thing. The impression only strengthens the farther you get into a bottle, and the final swigs were almost a chore.

I like Shiner enough that I had moral reservations about writing this post, but my disappointment was too overwhelming. I think it’s the worst of the beers I have tried in the series. Even more damaging was that it didn’t even come close to challenging a different beer I love brewed in the same Doppelbock style, called Ayinger Celebrator.

I’m hoping Shiner releases some sort of “sampler” pack with all of the anniversary edition beers, 96 through 100. It would be a fun way to make a final judgement on which beer rules this series. It’s a shame the finale turned out this way though.

Got a thought on the Shiner centennial series? Let’s hear it -

Scenario:
-11:45pm – 12:00pm – Waited at Park ln. Dart Station.
-12:00pm – Rode to Mockingbird station with bikes. Very cramped. Little to no room for passengers with bicycles.
-12:15pm – Arrived at The Cavern.
-12:45pm – Intoxicated
-1:00pm – 1:30pm – Drinking games at Old Crow.
-1:35pm – Skipped the Dart, cruised home with no problems.

Takeaways:
-Dart was too crowded even at on Friday at midnight.
-Dart is only optimal when traveling significant distances.
-Bike lights are extremely recommended.
-Greenville Ave. very crawl-able.
-Will be repeating very soon. (After holiday break)
-Gloves are crucial when battling winter windchill.
-The more the merrier.

Rolling 4 deep was a great start. All human powered vehicles are welcome. Email MeVersus for future rides!

Keller's Drive-in

Drive-in burger joints are becoming a rarity in big cities, victims of today’s “need-it-now” culture. People don’t have time to sit and wait while food is brought to their car anymore, not when they can get to the food and begin eating two minutes sooner. But for fans of a simpler, slightly less lazy era the drive-in offers all the comfort of immediate meals without the hassle of rising from a chair.

Keller’s Drive-In off of Northwest Highway is a great example of why these places worked. One look at this decrepit parking lot will tell you what the spot is all about: cheap food, beer, and cars. The menu consists of six basic, fast-food categories (strips, dogs, burgers, fries, shakes, and ‘mystery meat’) and you can get a full meal for four bucks. The waitresses are all pushing retirement age but their jovial, slightly sassy style is a treat compared to the generic smiles at your local Chili’s.

In another surprising twist, you can also order and (gasp) drink a beer or two in your car. I was surprised this was legal anywhere in town. Though I won’t try to sell the merits of drinking while driving, there is something sublime about reclining a-la-lazyboy and sipping a cold one while engines softly hum in the background. It strokes your inner Easy Rider.

Stop by one Saturday night and you’ll catch a gathering of vintage roadsters and muscles cars, along with the motley crowd that accompanies them. Even if you’re not hurting for a corndog, the people watching makes it worth a visit.