American ceremony (left) v. Laotian ceremony (right)

With Spring in the air and wedding season just beginning to bloom, I was fortunate to attend two weddings this past weekend, both completely different in cultural origins.  First off, your traditional American wedding, complete with elegant white dress, ridiculously cute flower girl, and traditional vows. Having been to quite a few of these, I think the ceremony itself has become quite stale and repetitive. Not to discredit the new Mr. and Mrs. Smith (real names), the ceremony was nice, elegant and quick. Sweet. But if you’re looking for something spicy…

Head hens at Laomerican reception

Enter Laos. A small country in Southeast Asia. This group of people are usually overlooked and lumped into the Pan-Asian category save Kahn Souphanousinphone of King of the Hill. This was actually my very first Laotian wedding experience and the tradition was abundant. Upon arrival, the groom was showered with decadence, bombarded with Laotian women yelling at him in tongue. The traditional feet washing before entering the bride’s house was priceless, only to be rivaled by the clueless expressions on the groom’s face. After an hour of monk chants, string tying, and foreign languages being tossed back and forth in the room, the party started. Neighbors from all over little Laos a.k.a. Saginaw, Texas were there to gamble, eat, and drink in celebration.

Videographer J. Logan and his date?

The reception was a cultural shock in itself. With whites and yellows mixing, the awkardness and tension was felt by all.  Predicting such, the groom & bride pre-ordered many cases of Grey Goose and Hennessy (a Laotian favorite) for ice-breaking goodness. Clutch.

Aside from the very ethnic food and 100% Laotian band, I would venture to say every culture parties pretty much the same way: drink, dance, yak in the ladies room and drive home. Cheers Tony and Leng Smith.

I’ll leave you with this.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QS5N0B5nzmM&feature=related]

-They try and lock up vehicles before the owner can even speak to them, eliminating any chance of discussing the issue rationally.
-They are often old men who act like jackasses. Being very short and terse with their skimpy explanation.
-They try to cut deals with you, offering to let your car go if you pay them cash in hand.
-They flock to car wreck scenes like vultures to a fresh kill, fighting for the days goods.
-No matter what the circumstance, once they’ve hooked up your car, you will be asking your friends for a ride (usually 20 miles from where you got towed, somewhere outside the city) to the outskirts of town to pay for your car, traveling expenses incurred by transporting, and time spent at the lot.

I once was towed while the car was running and a friend was sitting in the car with the doors open. They’re that cold.

I’ve always dreamt about fighting back. It’s hard not to feel righteous when you see an unshaven, overweight male yelling at a freshmen in college for having her car parked 7″ over the line. She cries and pleads as he continues with his “work”. I’ve often times dreamt about jumping in his truck, and towing him away. I’ve also dreamt about the sawed off shotgun he probably has locked and loaded.

Respect to this lady, she’s got more rice balls than I do.