I’ve been back in Dallas for a good half a year now. And every few weeks I’d hear people tell me they’ve just been to Chaucer’s for some good partying.

“Another new bar?”

“No, it’s a sushi place.”

“Wait… so it’s a restaurant?”

“Yeah. And a club.”

I’m already confused.

But since the word got around that cover was free on New Year’s Eve, I thought, why not? Even though we were there to party, my friend thought it’d be a good idea to snack on some sushi first. She raved about the seaweed salad so I reluctantly agreed to try it. Not bad. The rolls were mediocre. One of my pet peeves is sushi restaurants passing Sriracha sauce off as a spicy topping. To top that portion of the night off, I find one of their custom plates with “Chauecer’s” emblazoned on it. Ick.

The real confusion came when it was time to put my dancing shoes to work. There was no designated boogie area. Since the restaurant/club was set up to have a bar on each end of a small space, the overcrowding was inevitable. The other section of the restaurant was still filled with dining tables. That leaves meager space for dancing. But I was a good sport and tried to have fun anyway. However, throughout the night, servers kept pushing through. As they pass, I see their arms are filled with trays of sushi and drinks. I cringed as I thought of the infinite possibilities of happy, drunken dancers suddenly turning red when one of these trays spill on them.

The place even touted a free champagne toast at midnight, but did not deliver. I don’t drink myself, but I would’ve liked my free glass to appear cool with the in-crowd.

Disclaimer: The previous rant is regarding the Chaucer’s in Addison. I have only eaten at the one in Frisco, but have yet to parrtay there. Other locations include: Dallas, Lewisville, Allen, and Fort Worth.

I don’t know about the rest of you, but the break has been much too short for me. Come Monday, it’s back to the little workshop where you sit at your desolate desk and mourn for the break gone by. (Not me, of course. I have the best office in the world!) But have no fear, Jake & Amir are here! A little cure for boredom for you working Dallasites.

Silly? Yes. Tedious? Yes. Hilarious? Hells yes! May these little pick-me-ups bring you much joy this new 20089.

Podcast also available for free. Bust out the iPhones.