Vegas, the city where the rich go to flaunt, the meager go to dream, and the likes of MeVs go to escape for a few days in the penthouse at Caesars Palace.

With a few hours to spare, we had a chance to traverse The Strip without having to stop every few steps to photograph family members with plastered smiles. Our journey commenced from Caesars Palace, where the bell desk hospitably checked in our bags; then continued through the Bellagio, where high-end shops taunted our modest bank accounts. After escaping the maze, it was on over to Planet Hollywood, where the Miracle Mile Shops were. The stores there were not as intimidating, and by the good graces of God, there was an H&M (who desperately needs to open a location in Dallas.) We passed by Excalibur, into the Luxor, and ended up at Mandalay Bay. The last few hotels quickly became a blur to the now over-exposed visual senses. Solicitors still lined the sidewalks, either offering collectible calling-cards for the “hot babes” of Vegas or “water for one dolla.” The former obscenely littering the streets.

Unfavorable schedule conflicts only permitted the viewing of one show, Cirque du Soleil’s “O.” But what that extravaganza offered was enough to color our brains into sensory satiation. When the Bellagio and Cirque du Soleil decided to produce a show surrounding the theme of water, a lot of effort was put into constructing a stage that could seamlessly adapt to the performance. So in that respect, the theater itself became an important character of the show. During any act, there were a sundry of things to look at: lights, Olympic divers, contortionists from Mongolia, acrobats, a pyromaniac setting himself on fire, wind interacting swimmingly with water, and an adorable clown even clown-haters couldn’t resist.

Other than walking, sweating, and losing $20 at a slot machine, there was also a lot of eating, as per usual on any trip. Notable mentions are the Jean-Philippe Patisserie at the Bellagio, which features “the largest chocolate fountain the world” and cakes so beautiful patrons would apparently buy only to display in the dining room. The Payard Pâtisserie & Bistro in Caesar’s Palace has delectable crepes, among other delightful desserts, and does not charge an extra $2 for whipped cream as Jean-Philippe does. The Grand Wok at MGM incorporates multiple Asian styles into surprisingly tasteful dishes that include: Beef Tenderloin Asparagus in Black Pepper Sauce, Honey Walnut Shrimp, and Maine Lobster in a Thai Sauce. But be careful, the lobster dish can run you $150/plate. Seasonal pricing does not mean the same thing there as it does in Texas.

Everything is such a production everywhere you go, it’d be hard to come back and not expect even your morning coffee to magically dance for you. From the fountains that greet incoming guests, hotel pools decked in music video grandeur, pastries decorated with the most minute details, to a church with grandiose wall sculptures, life there could never be normal. We’re still not sure if this is a good or bad thing. All that can be said is… Carrot Top is performing? I thought his only talent was being in an ancient phone commercial.